The sexual life and times of no one in particular


Hi. I’m Lacey. It’s not my real name. But that doesn’t matter. I’ll get to that.

These snippets of my life are just that; a peek through the keyhole about various sexual encounters and lack thereof and my knowledge of sex and my own body (and lack thereof) and thoughts and experiences of that nature and all sorts of things in between. They are real, they are true, and they are mine. They are also NSFW.

I’ve come to realise over time just how much things I didn’t know, explanations never given to me, assumptions based on consumption of mainstream media and trashy teen magazines, how much these things have affected how and what I thought about sex and my body and other people’s experiences of sex and their bodies. And how differently I think about these things now. And how I probably will think differently about these things in the future.

I have thought long and hard about whether to associate my real name with my blog. Part of the whole point of sharing these stories is that I think they are common things felt, experienced and explored by ordinary people the world over. I can’t be the only one who has had a lifetime of epiphanies and discoveries about the birds and the bees. So I should be able to share them. And more importantly, I shouldn’t be ashamed or embarrassed about sharing them.

And I’m not.


There’s always a but. By the intimate nature of the words I will share, I will inevitably be inviting the world into the lives of many other people from whom I have not sought – and do not intend to seek – permission to share their intimacies. Even if names are changed throughout, the details of some stories will make it simple enough to identify the people involved. There’s also little way you can get around referring to a family member, when you consider their relation to me is entirely relevant to the story at hand.

And I don’t deny that having a pseudonym as privacy for myself and my family is also important.

But the thing is, it doesn’t really matter who I am. All you need to know is that I’m a thirty-something woman still discovering the world. These stories encompass past, present and future. They have happened to me, and probably someone else. Because these are stories of just an ordinary person, the life and times of no one in particular. I am no one, and I am anyone.

But, if you want, you can call me Lacey.